Thursday, January 18, 2007

10 questions I ask of the universe...........

1. How is it that 2 little boys, ages 3 and a half and almost 6, both less than 3 ft. tall (I think, haven't measured them in a while, but still you get the point...). So where was I? How is it that 2 little boys are able to get TOOTHBRUSHING SPLATTERS on a mirror at eye level for a grown-up???? amazing.....

2. Why is it that within 3 hours, and sometimes less, of me sweeping and mopping the floor is it almost GUARANTEED that someone will spill, drop, or throw some sort of juice, crumbs, dirt or vomit ONTO SAID CLEAN FLOOR??? (and no, I haven't gotten used to the whole sponga thinggie yet!)

3. Why is it that my husband has not touched a dirty dish in the sink, except to put it there, in months, or at least weeks??? And, NO the response "MY husband doesn't even know we HAVE a dishwasher!" isn't helpful.

4. Why is it that those same little boys, whose male parts are closest to the toilet bowl, have such a difficult time getting their pee into said toilet???

5. And why must they shake it AFTER they have stepped away from the toilet????

6. And WHY oh WHY did my almost 6 year old wake me up the other morning to tell me that he had made a "Doodie" and to ask me if he could flush, or would it wake me up????


7. And wait, there's more.................HOW is it that a family of 4 can produce so much laundry and consume so much food each week yet there never anything to wear and never anything to they say!

8. And why is it that the BIGGEST bills always come in the mail the week that you're feeling so far deep in the whole and that you're never going to get out? It's as if the universe is saying....."and you thought that was bad, just you wait...."

9. OH wait, here's a good one............back to those little people who live in my house again..............HOW is it that such small people can make such loud noises, big fusses, and whoa! such smelly farts!!!????

10. And last, but not least.................WHY oh why can kids not wait TWO MINUTES for someone to fill their juice cups, bring the ketchup, cut their shnitzel, or give them a snack......but when you ask them to put on their shoes, socks, pajamas, clothes, backpacks, ....................WHY OH WHY does it take at least 20 minutes for them to do what I ask????

Ok, there, I feel better now, thanks for listening.........any questions to add for the universe, while the universe is listening??? I'm sure there are more we could add to this list.........