Monday, April 24, 2006

Holy Shit....

We're getting close to the 2 month point before aliyah.

umm, excuse me? Can someone tell me how that happened???? wasn't it just yesterday (okay maybe even last week) that I was freaking out because I calculated that we were at the 4 month point? And maybe the day or so later that my friend D left?

So how does it feel? hmmmm...that's a good question.

here are a few thoughts on what it feels like, what I'm doing, and what's going through my head 2 months before making aliyah:
  • we're definitely "imbibing" a little more these days, nightly to be exact.
  • we're "this close" to officially saying YES to a shipper. freaky.
  • We've got 8 boxes officially packed, labeled, sealed, and recorded in my handy-dandy Excel spreadsheet that I created to record my boxes. (go me)
  • We're sending 2 suitcases back to Israel with my in-laws when they leave at the end of this week. (filled with toys, books, 2 sets of sheets for the boys, and some misc. clothing for them)
  • I'm wondering what the hell we're doing.
  • Everyone else is wondering what the hell wer're doing.
  • I'm wishing it was all over with and that we were just there already.
  • I'm less stressed over it all (the accupuncture may be helping with that...or it's the nightly indulgence. hmm...I wonder).
  • I'm wondering if anyone is throwing us any sort of going-away party, planning a gift, (money would be nice), or anything.
  • I'm wondering if I'm nuts for moving all of the way across the world to live CLOSER to my mother-in-law and FURTHER AWAY from my own mother.
  • I'm hoping we don't have to declare bankrupcy to make this all other words, still hoping to get financial help. no final word yet.
  • and again, i'm just wondering what the hell we're doing........
  • I'm pissed (no offense to anyone) about the pigua in Tel Aviv....I'm mad that now when I tell people that don't know our plans, that you KNOW that that is on their minds when they say "really? Israel,huh?"
  • I'm also very sad for the family of the 16 year old who goes to the Day School around the corner from us, that he and his father were injured in the bombing. Last I heard, he's had his leg amputated and is still in serious condition. If you're a prayer, pray; poor kid.
  • I'm also sad that this community now has a personal fear to prevent them from coming to Israel.
  • There's just so much going on in my head, and yet, there is also so little. I try not to be too in touch with my feelings over some of this. For example, if I even think about the fact that I am moving away from my mom, tears come to my eyes. It's not fair. I'm feeling like a kid who wants the chocolate candy AND the lollipop, when being told to choose ONE. I want them both.........I want to live there and be close to some people here. It's so difficult.

There ya have it folks..... The babbling, run-on, random thoughts of someone 2 months BEFORE aliyah.

holy shit, we're really doing this, aren't we?