Thursday, March 27, 2008

A NOT so lovely afternoon at the park...and a new way to RECYCLE plastic bags...

Hi friends (all 3 of you...) Sorry I haven't written in a while. With Purim, and just well, the craziness of life going on, I haven't had the head to sit and write anything. And haven't had the inspiration........until now. I wanted to tell you about my afternoon.........

So, I had this wonderful plan to pick the boys up after school, to bring the dog with us, and to go to a park. It's a gorgeous day! Anyway, I always forget to take my boys' bathroom schedules into account when I make plans like these. I mainly figured that I'll bring them for an hour of fun, and then they would come with me to the grocery store to "help". I even wrote up a LIST for each of them, Aviv's just words, and ilan's has words and pictures.

Well, needless to say, we are back at home. Here's what happened...........We were innocently playing at a park the boys call the "Exercise Park" cuz it was designed essentially for grown-ups....there are different equipment that are essentially exercise machines. There are big stickers on each piece of equipement that say ONLY OVER AGE 14, but really, 90% of the people I see there are children.

So there we were, playing happily. I even got my fat a$$ on one of the psuedo bikes and was pedaling up a mini sweat for about 2 minutes. (YES< I am THAT out of shape). Suddenly my big guy, who is almost 7 tells me that he has to poop! My initial reaction is to look for wipes so that he can go in the bushes (yes, we've done this numerous times), but I didn't have any wipes with me, not even a used tissue. So I told them we needed to go straight home. We live 2 minutes from the park and could have been ok. "No, no, no, I'll hold it in, I'm ok!" he tells me. And since this is a kid who doesn't usually hold it in, I figured it mustn't be that bad.

Until 3 minutes later, "Emah! I think I need to go again!"

Me: That's it boys, let's go. This is ridiculous!
A: no, I don't want to leave, I'm ok. I'm NOT leaving.
Me: Ok, 2 more minutes. (stupid, stupid me)

And no, we didn't last 2 more minutes until he was screaming again,

A: EMAH.......I'm going, help! (and no, not going as in leaving the park...)
Me: I'm comiing, go over to the bushes..........

So he runs over to the bushes, which were on the other side of a cement bench. He stands up on the bench, pulls down his pants, hangs his rear end over the bushes, and proceeds to give them a feeding of a lifetime!!! I'm freaking out by this point trying not to laugh, cry, or scream!

I run over to him to assess the damage.......and it's not good. The explosion had started before the pants came down, and thus the evidence had travelled down the leg and all over the crocs (yes, thank goodness he was wearing crocs today!)

I stood there in shock for a minute truly unsure of what to do. I helped him out of his pants thinking maybe something was spared.........but no. Then, my brilliant child, who had just shat his poor little guts out in public on a bush, had a wonderful idea............

A: Emah, maybe if you have a plastic bag we can cut holes in it for my legs and pull it up like pants!

ARE YOU LAUGHING YET??? You're thinking, no she didn't???

Well my friends, YES she did..........I happened to have a few extra plastic bags with me because as I said, we brought the dog with us, so I wrapped the poopie clothes up in one bag, and then fashioned the cutest little sumo wrestler type plastic bag underwear for my son! We laughed together for a bit, until he decided it was hurting his feelings and I had to stop. But it's ok if you yes, we walked all the way back to the car (a good half block), and drove home in his plastic bag pants!

And yes, straight into the shower he went! I scrubbed him from head to toe, scrubbed me from finger tip to elbow, and yes, I still smell it! I'm just waiting for hubby to come home and for the boys to go to bed so that I can laugh out loud again where it won't hurt his feelings!